The key to self-love is self forgiveness. I learned this from a podcast where gwenyth paltrow said this to end it off. If you want to listen to it, it’s on Anna Ferris’ , “Unqualified” podcast.
The reason that self-forgiveness is so important, is because no matter what we do, it’s never going to perfect in our eyes. We are always going to be making mistakes, or thinking we haven’t done well enough, all throughout our lives. No matter how wise, smart, or careful we are, nothing we do will be perfect. And some days, it seems that everything we do is wrong. And no matter what, we can’t help that, that’s just how life is. Becuase we are not robots, so we are always going to make mistakes.
So, with that in hindsight, we must forgive ourselves for the things we don’t like that we have done in our lives. When we forgive ourselves, it heals us and gives us the freedom to carry on without holding ourselves back because of previous mistakes. It gives us a chance to start over, to look forward positively so we can move forward and do something positive. It changes our mindset, helping us to have lower expectations of ourselves which in turn opens up so much space and we find ourselves approaching life more calmly, and treating ourselves more lovingly.
When we don’t hold it against ourselves for each little wrongdoing we did that day, and instead we let it go and move on, we feel good. When we understand we aren’t perfect and never will be, we recognize we are normal and we shouldn’t be holding ourselves to such high expectations and we move on. When we forgive ourselves, it releases us from the past and allows us to fully enjoy the present moment without reservations. Living in the present moment is a big part of self-love, because you are only taking on as much as you can handle. You are not trying to handle things in the past or future, which we really shouldn’t be. It’s in the past. Also, it gives us the opportunity for growth when we recognize that we don’t have to know everything immediately. Self-forgiveness is not allowing ourselves to not try, but it is realizing that we can be bad at things at the beginning and still have so much room for improvement. It isn’t using an excuse like, well I’m only human so I don’t have to try and don’t have to be good at anything ever again. Self-forgiveness is when you are trying, but in your eyes it still doesn’t feel good enough. It is for the times when you are being so hard on yourself, that giving yourself breathing room is a generous act of self-love. It is knowing that giving yourself that forgiveness is what is going to move you forward, because you know can approach things from a more relaxed space.
When we are in a state of self-forgiveness, embracing the imperfections, things flow so easily and naturally. Because we know and are accepting of the fact that we can’t do everything how we want to all of the time, we start doing more, no matter what it looks like. We know we are going to forgive ourselves for mistakes, so we are more motivated to get up and try. We are no longer punishing ourselves for wrongdoings, so if it doesn’t matter if we mess up, we are going to much more willing to experiment, to work, to exercise, to talk, to just do more things. Because the truth is, when we are creating, when we are actually spending more time interacting with life, that is when we are the most alive, and also when we are helping the most people. When we are making ourselves present (because we aren’t stuck in our past mistakes) and contributing in whatever way we know how, we are inspiring others to interact with life, and inspiring them to contribute. When we can let go of self-judgment, we have much more freedom and inspiration to keep going.
Self-forgiveness allows us to live a much richer life than we ever could have imagined. When we don’t care about what happens, we are willing to dry and do almost anything!
Source:
Gimme some honey 